Be Friends With Time

Friends,

Time is always moving.

The question is whether we are moving with it consciously.

Every day contains movements.

Expressions.

Exposures.

Conversations.

Decisions.

Distractions.

Opportunities.

Moments we planned for and moments we never expected.

Together, those moments become a life.

This is why I have come to believe that conscious living is deeply connected to our relationship with time.

To live consciously is to become aware of where your time is taking you.

It is to live with enough purpose that one moment can build upon the last.

It is learning to become friends with time.

Work alongside it.

Ride its wave.

Use it rather than constantly wondering where it went.

Be friends with time. Work alongside it. Ride its wave.

Conscious Living

To be conscious is to be aware.

But awareness by itself is only the beginning.

Conscious living means using that awareness to live in purpose.

You begin asking:

A conscious person understands that a life is rarely changed by one dramatic moment alone.

Direction accumulates.

A conversation can move you.

A relationship can move you.

A habit can move you.

A book can move you.

A game can move you.

A decision can move you.

A repeated exposure can move you.

Small movements become patterns.

Patterns become direction.

Direction eventually becomes destination.

Destiny is shaped by the direction we repeatedly give our time.

Movement, Expression, and Exposure

Within Cruz Way, we pay attention to three Forms:

Conscious Movement.

Conscious Expressions.

Conscious Exposures.

Movement is what we do.

Expression is what we send out.

Exposure is what we allow to shape us.

These three areas are happening throughout the day whether we are conscious of them or not.

Our bodies are moving.

Our faces are communicating.

Our words are sending signals.

Our attention is being exposed to people, media, environments, ideas, food, information, energy, and experiences.

Conscious living asks us to notice.

1. Conscious Movement

   How am I using my body and actions?

2. Conscious Expression

   What signal am I sending?

3. Conscious Exposure

   What am I allowing to shape me?

None of us will move consciously every second.

That is not the goal.

The goal is to become increasingly aware of when we have moved away from the direction we intended.

That awareness gives us another choice.

Distraction and Drift

Distraction happens.

Sometimes distraction is harmless.

Sometimes we intentionally rest, play, wander, explore, or give our attention to something simply because we enjoy it.

Rest can serve purpose.

Play can serve purpose.

Exploration can reveal something we did not know we needed.

The greater danger is drift.

Drift happens when our attention repeatedly moves without conscious direction and gradually carries us away from what matters.

Drift can be difficult to notice because it rarely announces itself.

It may begin with a few minutes.

Then an hour.

Then a routine.

Then a pattern.

Eventually, we look up and realize that our time has been building something we never consciously chose.

Rest returns you to purpose. Drift makes returning more difficult.

A Conscious Crusader learns to notice the difference.

The question is not:

“Am I working every second?”

The better question is:

“Do I know where my attention is going, and am I comfortable with what it is building?”

See the Red Flags Early

One benefit of living consciously is that patterns become easier to recognize.

You begin seeing red flags before the full problem manifests.

Something shifts in a relationship.

Your attention changes.

A habit begins consuming more time.

Your body starts sending a signal.

Your mood changes after a certain exposure.

A commitment repeatedly pulls you away from your purpose.

A conversation produces an emotional response.

An environment no longer supports who you are trying to become.

Consciousness gives you an opportunity to notice the signal early.

Then you can make a decision.

Address it.

Adjust something.

Clarify a boundary.

Ask a question.

Seek support.

Change the environment.

Or leave something that repeatedly moves you away from where you intend to go.

Awareness does not guarantee the perfect decision.

It gives us the opportunity to make a conscious one.

A red flag noticed early is an opportunity to make the next move consciously.

Emotion Is a Signal

Consciousness also changes our relationship with emotion.

Emotion does not have to immediately determine our behavior.

An emotion can become information.

Something happened.

A feeling arose.

Something in the moment deserves our attention.

Perhaps a boundary was crossed.

Perhaps we hurt someone.

Perhaps someone surprised us.

Perhaps we experienced joy.

Perhaps something touched a fear, expectation, memory, hope, or desire.

The conscious person notices before automatically reacting.

This creates a space between what happened and what happens next.

Inside that space lives choice.

Emotion is a signal to become conscious, not a command to become reactive.

Sometimes the signal tells us that we caused harm.

Consciousness allows us to recognize that.

Virtue tells us what to do next.

We may need to acknowledge what happened.

Listen.

Apologize.

Repair harm.

Clarify a boundary.

Or change how we move forward.

Consciousness without responsibility is incomplete.

Recognize the Teachable Moment

Emotion also creates what I call a teachable moment.

A teachable moment is a moment in which emotion makes something important visible.

The emotion may be difficult.

It may also be positive.

A child may become excited.

Someone may feel proud.

A learner may become frustrated.

A teammate may become disappointed.

A person may feel deeply appreciated.

Something becomes visible.

In that moment there may be an opportunity for:

• Acknowledgment
• Appreciation
• Encouragement
• Guidance
• Correction
• Reflection
• Companioning

Maturity develops through these moments.

When adults recognize teachable moments, they can help young people understand what they are experiencing rather than simply reacting to the behavior that appears on the surface.

The same is true for adults.

Life keeps presenting teachable moments.

The question is whether we are present enough to recognize them.

Return to CenterSpace

There will be moments when we lose that presence.

We become frustrated.

Distracted.

Overwhelmed.

Excited.

Angry.

Afraid.

Attached to an outcome.

Our attention moves away from the present moment.

This is why Cruz Way begins with RESET.

RESET is the goal.

FORM is the instructions.

VOID is the work.

RESET means to become free of thought and set again or differently.

It is returning to the time value:

Now.

When I am off ease, I RESET.

CenterSpace is that inner space of self, heart, and present awareness to which I am trying to return.

The past may contain lessons.

The future may contain goals.

The present is where I can move.

Purpose Does Not Mean Constant Productivity

Living on purpose does not mean turning every minute into work.

That would miss the point.

Rest has purpose.

Play has purpose.

Relationships have purpose.

Celebration has purpose.

Exploration has purpose.

Quiet has purpose.

Sometimes doing less is the most conscious move available.

Purpose means understanding why you are giving something your time.

You can spend an afternoon playing and be completely conscious about that choice.

You can spend an entire day working and still be drifting if the work no longer serves anything you actually value.

The question is not how busy you are.

The question is whether your time and your intention remain in relationship.

Conscious living is not constant productivity. It is intentional relationship with time.

What This Means for Education

Young people need opportunities to develop this relationship with time before adulthood.

If every moment of a child’s day is controlled by someone else, there are fewer opportunities to practice directing attention.

This is one reason learner ownership matters at JRX Academy.

Students need goals.

They also need choices.

They need responsibilities.

They need opportunities to experience consequences.

They need adults who notice when support is needed and when stepping back would create greater growth.

A Quest gives time direction.

A portfolio makes the result of that time visible.

Reflection helps the learner understand what happened.

RESET gives the learner a way to return when they drift.

Over time, students should increasingly become able to ask:

Those are not only school questions.

They are life questions.

One Final Thought

Time is going to move whether we work with it or not.

Days become months.

Months become years.

Experiences accumulate.

Relationships develop.

Skills strengthen or weaken.

Ideas become projects.

Projects become institutions.

Small choices become patterns.

The goal is not to control every moment.

The goal is to remain conscious enough to participate in where those moments are taking us.

Know what you are building.

Notice what is shaping you.

Recognize the red flags.

Honor the teachable moments.

Repair harm when you create it.

Protect appropriate boundaries.

Rest when rest serves you.

Return when you drift.

RESET when you move away from ease.

Then make the next conscious move.

Be friends with time.

Work alongside it.

Ride its wave.

Let neither distraction nor drift rob you of the life you are working to build.